Ben's journey home

Laxadazy?

2009-10-25T09:18:00.000-07:00

Is that how you spell it? At any rate, the meaning, in a word?.....slacker! I know, that's me. Sorry. I feel especially slacking today as I was catching up on a friends site and the news of her son. She is VERY good at keeping up her site. Kuddos to you! (It must be your mad scientist traits) So, I'm making a vow...to be a "little" better. One thing that should help will be this new super-duper, suped up model of a laptop. It has a "program" that remembers my logins and passwords. I know, sounds simple. But for me, not so much. One time I forgot my codes to this sight for over six month. And then one night, in a moment of rare inspiration, it just came to me. (Thank you Lord for those moments, but if I may, they are more few and far between than I would like).

On to Ben..he is just plain wonderful! He started preschool this year. I am soooo proud him. He has adjusted well, (even though they changed teachers on him a few weeks into school) He is catching up fine. (sniff in the air to the teacher that said he would be behind for a while and even hinted at us holding him back a year or two..what does she know. She obviously was incapable of picking up on the blatant signs of genius that my son exudes from every pore!) No, I am not bitter.

Ben is learning how to create and nourish friends. This has been fun to watch. But at times, a little disheartening. Some days he comes home and I ask him about his friends he usually talks about the most. He will reply with a smile turned upside down and then a comment like, "He didn't want to share with me." Well, I guess they are all learning to nourish relationships.

He has seemed to have been voted the "most eligible batchelor" of the pre-k class. When I bring Ben in the mornings, there are four adorable girls waiting for his arrival. One of them always keeps a lookout at her post near the front door. When they see us coming, I can hear her squeel, "there he is" as she goes running back to the others in their group. Then they giggle and squeel with delight. When we turn the corner into his room. They rush forward and said in their sweetest and most coy voices, "Good morning Ben". He usually grunts and rolls his eyes. (That a way baby! Just you remember who your number one is...Mama!)

Below are some of his recent photos. My baby...the most wonderful child that ever graced the earth!

Spring Showers and May Flowers

2009-05-17T12:18:00.000-07:00

Another spring and all is right with the world at George's Farm. Ben is growing like a weed. And he is smart as a whip. The things that come out of his mouth...man, they floor me sometimes.

His adjustment has come a long way since last spring. He has been home 16 months and he still talks about his foster-family in Guatemala. But now it seems to all be coming together for him. When you ask him where he was born, he will reply, "Guatemala" And when you ask, "Where do you live?" He says, "In Pollocksville, with Momma and Papa." And he definitely is able to make the distinction between his foster-mother and myself. He seems to no longer feel the tug of war in his heart. (Thank you Lord!) His relationship with other people seems to come and go. He has his good days. On those, he trusts almost everybody he should. But on bad days, he is very wary of those around him. But as I said earlier, it's all coming together. It has been a long road for my pumpkin and those that love him. But the ties he is establishing right now are deep and strong and I pray they will be the one's that get him through the tough times as he gets older.

That last statement was a little odd, I know. I found out this week that a friend of mine from high school killed himself a few years back. It has shook me to the core. What would bring a person to do that? If he could have held on just a moment longer before taking the actions he did, maybe life would have seemed a little different. But he didn't. And so ended a precious gift he was entrusted with, his life. If only he would have reached out to someone. I can name over a dozen people that would have been there for him, if he would have just asked. Such a tragedy. A loss that all of us feel, in some way or another. God bless you B. Even though we were no longer close, you are missed. I hope you have peace.

Season of good cheer!

2008-12-16T16:23:00.000-08:00

Hi all! I hope everyone is well. We went to Ben's first Christmas parade last weekend. What a blast! The whole world changes when you see it through a child's eyes. As the parade would pass by, people would throw candy towards Ben. He would get so excited and yell out, "Wow!" At one time, he looked at me and said, "This is better than Halloween!" By the time the parade was over he had a whole blanket full of loot. Aside from the candy, he really enjoyed just being there. I love seeing him so happy.

Another story I have to tell. This one is outside of holiday cheer. It falls under the heading of just plain 'ol everyday life with my lil' man. Since he has been recently potty trained, going to the bathroom around my house is a REALLY big deal. So much so, that when he poopoos, we make comments on it like, "Wow, that's a monster poopoo", or "Look, there's the babies!". At any rate, today he was on the toilet, trying his best to poopoo. After he has turned himself red in the face, he looks up at my husband and says, "I can't, my poopoo must be asleep." and then shrugs his shoulders as if to say he just doesn't understand life sometimes.

The pics are of my Mom and Dad in the parade, Ben at the beach right before the parade, Ben's very own toy soldier, (actually he was part of the parade and he jumped out of line and squatted by us just as my sister was about to click the camera). Thanks to the toy soldier, whomever you are!

Have a wonderful holiday season!

He ain't no Woodsman!

2008-12-08T10:44:00.000-08:00

My baby is a lot of things, but he ain't no Woodsman! Yesterday was a very traumatic day for our family. My lil' one got his hand caught in a wood splitter...yikes! Needless to say we spent most of the evening and night at the emergency room. They had to perform surgery and piece his finger back together. The bone was crushed but according to the surgeon, it was still viable and he expects a wonderful recovery. Thank you God! My lil' soldier was so brave. And he stole the hearts of everyone he came in contact with. When one of the nurses went to put his patch for the EKG on him, he looked up at her and said, "No thanks". That did it for the whole surgery crew. From then on in I believe they all would have given him their lives just to keep him comfortable.

Well my lil' soldier is home, resting wonderfully. And I am so thankful it isn't any worse. He's a real trooper.

I said he ain't no Woodsmen, but he is super-duper smart. I bet this will be the only time he decides to test the wood splitter. (I hope)

Boos and Bears

2008-10-26T17:27:00.000-07:00

Hi all!
We spent the weekend on the road. First we went to the Discovery Place in Charlotte. It was a lot of fun and Ben got a kick out of all the exhibits. But the one he kept wanting to go back to was the bears. They had a Grizzly that ws huge and he just loved it!

Today we went to the zoo. They had a Boo-fest for Halloween. Kids got to play games, face-painting, dress up in their costumes and get some candy. Ben just loves being at the zoo. This was our second trip this year. Because of the weather, this one was a much more enjoyable trip than the last year. It was a beautiful day! Ben went through every exhibit, but he enjoyed the Sea Lions the most. They were in a playful mood and kept swimming right in front of him. The bears had already layed down for an afternoon nap. So there wasn't much to see there. But the whole place was abuzz with children dressed up and enjoying the day. I have attached a few pictures. From now on, whenever I look back at these pictures, I will count it as one of the most perfect days.

God bless,
Gayle

Somebody pinch me, please!

2008-10-18T15:00:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was a day like any other. Went to work, came home, blah, blah, blah. But when I came home and went to Gammie's to pick up my lil' pumpkin. They were all outside. He saw me and ran towards me yelling, "Mama, Mama, I miss you." And then he jumped into my arms and gave me the most wonderfullest hug and a kiss. The sun was shining and it was a beautiful day. But nothing could compare to that feeling. Here was my son! He loves me. And God only knows how my heart is 'bout to burst with love for him. Thank you dear Lord for this gift you have allowed me. I know I don't deserve such a precious treasure. I will cherish him all my days and take the best of care of him. I promise to be his ever vigilant custodian. I am amazed.
Gayle

No more Pampers...WooHoo!

2008-10-04T06:03:00.000-07:00

I claim VICTORY for the home team! I believe we have defeated the potty training monster. Yeah! My lil' one has done so well with this. He has had a few mishaps, but for the most part...he is the smartest little boy in the world. Next week we move to nuclear science! (he should grasp this concept with no problem)

Potty Training 101

2008-09-25T15:43:00.000-07:00

Got valium? OK, 6 changes later and we are still no closer than before. The issue seems to be Ben doesn't understand how to avoid using the bathroom in his pants. I keep asking him to tell me before he peepees. He says, OK. And then it happens again. I have tried bribery with stickers, new super-duper cool underwear and plain out talking about it. Nothing seems to be working. I am certain that at almost three and a half, he should be just about ready. Who knows. Am I doing something wrong? We go to the bathroom every 30 to 45 minutes. But I'm just not catching him in time.

Shouldn't there be an "easy" button for this?

Gayle

Weathering the storms and loving the Joy!

2008-09-25T07:45:00.000-07:00

Updating...hmmmmm. I know I have been sort of slack on the blogging of late. Sorry. Today's version of family news is brought by "gentle" urging from a dear friend. Hope this helps with the DT's, Deb.

Let's seeeeeee...Ben is a wonderful bowl of sunshine. That pretty much sums it up. I'll write later when I have more to post. (snicker) Just kidding :o) Actually our lives have been cram-jam full of everyday excitement. Ben's progress into becoming a George is superb. He really is doing great at adjustment and life in general. He has a wonderful personality. Full of smiles, love and a great humor. In fact, he is so comfortable in his role in the George family that yesterday a lady even remarked on how much he is like me. She called him spoiled. That kind of stung a little.

The day unfolded as a very busy event of running from appt after appt and culminating in the last appt of the day, the vet.s office. We hit the ground running early in the morning for gymnastics. And the last stop was for my oldest labs' doctors visit. This was the first time Ben had been to the vet. We walk in the front and a "lady" and her two, quiet, sweet as angels, sons were sitting at her side. Her pit-bull proceeded to snarl and growl at my docile, cuddly as a bug, lab. So they wisked her and her ravaging dog and two sweetheart sons into a private room. Well, we went on with our business and appt. After everything was finished we come out of our room only to see HER standing at the front desk, paying her bill. When she saw us, she has her angelic sons take her snarling dog out to the car. Thank you! She then proceeded to strike up a conversation with me. I thanked her for removing her beast. She then started to ask me about Ben. She said, "He's an only child, right?" I said yes. Then she said, "He's SPOILED." I said, "Thank you, yes he is." I was floored. After I got out to my car and gained my composure I was floored again. What did she say about my son!?! And who the #@!% is she? Yes, he acted up a little while we were waiting. But good God, he had been cooped up in the car all day and had a very traumatic experience at the dentist office. Wait...am I just making excuses for him? He was acting up. But really. My angel....spoiled? At any rate, spoiled or not. If I had the quick wit of some I know, I would have been able to reply with something good like, "At least he's not a future poster child for America's most wanted". Or something like that. Oh well, in all seriousness, he's probably a "little" spoiled. But I wonder how many times I have passed judgement on someone else's child, not taking into account that I don't know the whole story. And instead of supporting my fellow sister and understanding she is probably doing the best she can at the moment, I have walked away, all high and mighty, thinking to myself, "if I ever have children, they will NEVER behave that way". Yeah, right!

Here are a few pics of Ben. He is growing right up in front of us. There are times I pick him up and realize how far down his feet are dangling. Then it strikes me just how fast he really is growing.

Oh...and did I tell you about Ben's dentist appt? Yesterday was his first "routine" vist. He has some decay. I expected that. After all, you can't suck on formula out of a bottle for almost three years and not have a little decay. After the checkup, the dentist, in his most sympathetic voice he could muster explained to me just how extensive his decay was. I was very diligent in listening until he got to the expense part....$5,500. WAIT....when I get back up from the floor, I want to hear that again. I'm not so sure I got it right the first time. Did you say Five Thousand, Five Hundred DOLLARS? US DOLLARS? WAIT...aren't these the same teeth he will start losing in about two years? Well that explains it. No wonder the boy is spoiled. If I spent 55 hundred dollars in a span of fifteen minutes, I'd be spoiled too!

God bless,
Gayle

P.S. I am home for the next four days. The mission...potty training. God, give me strength!

Lazy Days of Summer

2008-07-08T18:02:00.000-07:00

Child Abuse

Round and round and round we go!

Aunt Sissy and Ben in the front yard.

Zoo Pictures

2008-05-31T05:14:00.001-07:00

Spring Showers

2008-05-04T19:04:00.000-07:00

Spring showers bring May flowers......

I've heard this a million times. But this year, it has a totally different meaning for me. My baby bug has blossomed under the warm May sun. This past week my whole family went on vacation and it was great for all of us. Especially great for bonding with Ben. It just seemed to have clicked for him this past week. Almost like overnight he decided this was his family and he knows he belongs with us.

My name has now been replaced from "Momma Yina" to "Mommy". AND I LOVE IT!!! God has blessed me with my child and when he looks up at me with his most handsome eyes, I can't help but give thanks. I pray I never forget just how blessed we are. Enough of the teary stuff...on to the antics.

Ben has a personality that just gets better everyday. He loves to play Dinosaur, Action Fingers, Snake and just about everything else that is "all boy". He kept most of us rolling this past week. Oh, and one great thing that needs to be mentioned...I believe he has just about beaten his motion sickness. Can I get a "Halelujah"? Now the lil' bug can go everywhere with us. And his sleeping pattern seems to be smoothing into just that...a pattern. Overall he just seems more at peace and comfortable. I am so glad to see him easing into being part of our family. I have so many hopes for him. Now I feel he has a chance at conquering the whole world!

Amazing.....says it all

2008-03-22T08:24:00.000-07:00

Please make sure your speakers are on. These are pictures of Ben's Journey Home. It expands over two and a half years. Thank God he is finally home and we are starting our lives together!

God bless!!!

Make an on-line slide show at www.OneTrueMedia.com

DNA received

2008-02-03T07:13:00.000-08:00

Just a quick update...
The embassy received our DNA this past Thursday at 3:40 in the afternoon. I am sitting on pins and needles!!! We are soooo close, but still so far. Pray for a date this coming week, please.
Paz a todos,
Gayle

Three Simple Letters

2008-01-23T18:16:00.000-08:00

Three Simple Letters means so much....DNA. We received authorization for DNA today!!! Yeah, WaHoo, Yippee! Little Benjamin will have his swabbing tomorrow, they will send the "stick" back to the lab and then they will mail the results to the embassy. The lady at Orchid Genescreen was so nice today. When she intitially pulled up my paperwork, she said, "Oh my! This has been a long time coming." She also offered to keep me informed every step of the way. (I just love it when people are sincerely happy for you.)

I expect that we will know something next week. I hope the days go by fast. If they do not, I surely will be tied up in knots by the time we get any information. We are so close...but yet so far. Thank you God for getting us here!

Paz a todo,
Gayle

Proud Papa

2008-01-21T18:21:00.000-08:00

My Funny Man! This is proud Papa letting off a little steam with some comic relief. Do you think Ben will want to grow up to be just like his father?

Gayle

Our world has been righted

2008-01-20T06:27:00.001-08:00

Whew....I think we dodged another bullet. (well, more like letting the bullet ricochet off us) Leslie from Senator Burr's office was very efficient in helping us with our embassy problem. She called me back, bright and early the next day with an answer. She said that the embassy had closed our case because our I600A had expired, even though we had an approved and valid I171H sitting there. The reason being that they are so overloaded right now with all the PAP's trying to get their children home that they are trying to clear the clutter. Now, why couldn't they have told me that instead of that very sterile and nonemotional response of, "your file is administratively closed". I bet that whole little incident took at least 2 years off my life. Anyway, apparantley the fix is simple. I scanned a copy of our approval to the Senator's office. They in turn are forwarding it to the embassy. We hope this will be enough. If not, I think they said we can just open the case back up when we get there with the physical document. WooHoo!

AND.....we have more good news! We have the passport in hand! Yeah, one step closer. Next we apply to the embassy for DNA authorization, get results and then submit for visa appointment. I love the color PINK! (for those that don't know, the visa appt. is referred to as having PINK, because it used to be issued on a pink slip, now they just email it.)

AND...one last thing. Ilse was talking with one of the old facilitator's assistant the other day and she told her of Ben coming home. The reply was that she couldn't believe it, she thought that boy would never be able to come home and that they all thought his case was a lost cause. Well, due to the grace of God, power of a lot of prayer, (and just as much money) and much help from many friends, we may have our miracle soon! The way I see it. We are looking at picking Ben up in the middle to late February. Somebody, please pinch me! We might actually be able to get off this rickety 'ol rollercoaster soon!!!

Paz a todo!
Gayle

At Every Turn

2008-01-17T16:35:00.000-08:00

New Dilemma....emailed the US Embassy in Guatemala today to find out if we have been submitted to receive DNA authorization. Boy, was I in for a shock. The reply simply stated that they had administratively closed our case as of July 2007. W-H-A-T! What does that mean? How do I fix it? Who has to fix it? When can it be done? How long will this take? These are just a few of the questions I had and no one to ask. You see, you can't just call the Embassy and ask them a casual question. Your congressman has to do that. Just another link in the long chain. ( And who ever heard of a US Embassy that wasn't open to US citizens?)

Anyway, I emailed AS. They suggested to me, not just once, but twice, to get my congressman involved as soon as possible. They have never heard of a case being administratively closed. (Hmmm, imagine that.)

So, I did just that. First I contacted my female congress person's office. I chose her, thinking that they would be a little more sympathetic, being she's a mother herself. Wrong. I received the same 'ol run of the mill reply, first you have to submit a consent form, then follow it with an explanation of what the problem is, blah, blah, blah. Dead end. Couldn't they hear the hysterical tone to my voice? Don't they know how hard we have fought to this point?

So I did what every squeaky wheel does...I whined a little louder at the next stop. I called Richard Burr's office and much to my surprise, they were sympathetic and understanding and helpful and concerned. Whew, relief. Someone that actually sees this as the same emergency I see. They were truly genuine people. They admitted to not knowing what administratively closed meant. But they committed to finding out. (What a nice change of pace - honesty). I am still a little freaked at this last development. But I feel much better at our chances of getting this resolved since speaking with Ms. L.A. at Burr's office. She had me email her our timeline and all the info. on Ben, myself and my husband. She said she would email them and then follow up with a phone call. I have hope that she will be able to give me some sort of answer tomorrow. If not, I will have to wait out the weekend. (And we all know how excruciating that can be).

You know, I have to say that I have been taught a lesson about myself through this process. I could be labeled an obsessive person. When something has gone wrong in our process, (and much has). I find myself fixating to it. All I want to do is work on it, or think about it or talk to someone about it. I would have never thought of myself as having this gene. But I can't help myself. Today, when all of this was going on...in my mind, I kept thinking, "Don't you people know what is happening here? Don't you understand what kind of problem this is? How could you possibly want me to do something as trivial as work when I have such a HUGE emergency on my hands!" Of course, I haven't totally lost all my marbles, (just yet). So I can still tell myself there is a time and place for everything. And the middle of my office, packed with clients, is not the time nor the place to have a frenzied meltdown. So I continue the charade and smile warmly as I greet the next client at my desk. But on the inside, the war continues.

God, please put the right people in place to correct this latest dilemma. And also, please clear the way for us to bring home our son with no further "bumps". And give me the strength to stand tall and behave as my mother would be proud. I am weary. But with you, I know all is possible. Amen.
Gayle

Cup not always half full

2008-01-15T03:04:00.000-08:00

Confession......On days when I am a little tired, I find that I am not as grateful as I should be. Today, I was reading some posts and there was one that caught my eye. The person was posting that they received DNA results today. I posted a reply and congratulated her, (after all, isn't that what our mothers have taught us, to be gracious?) Then I read the rest of her post and timeline. She was in PGN with no KO's, and she was approved from PGN AFTER us. She will be bringing home her child at a whoppin' 5 months old. This is wonderful news and I am glad for her, (diplomatic answer). But sometimes I want to revert back to 4 and whine, "Why not me" Don't get me wrong...I am tickled that our son is finally coming home and I love him to the moon and back. But, I guess, sometimes I get a little sad at how much we have missed. And you know...the fact that we continue to hit "bumps" in the road at every turn is a little tiring. I'm weary of the bumpy road, I would like smooth sailing for a little bit. Is that too much to ask? (Now I do sound like I'm whining) WHERE ARE MY ROSE-COLORED GLASSES!?! FOR GOD SAKE, PLEASE FIND MY GLASSES!!!

Paul, PAUL, P-A-U-LLL....Where did you put my glasses this time!?!

Right baby...Wrong name

2008-01-12T19:00:00.000-08:00

WOOHOO!!! Just received a copy of Ben's new BC. You know,...the one I was so excited would have George as his last name. WRONG!!! Can't believe it, but they even messed this up. They got the new BC with my husband's last name. And on all the paperwork we filed with the embassy, I am the petitioner and Paul is the spouse. We purposely did this because we intended for Ben to have my last name. Oh well. If anything were to run smooth in this adoption I would think the sky was getting ready to fall.......just ain't gonna' happn'! But, provided this last little slip doesn't cause us problems at the embassy, at least we do have it confirmed that he is really our child! WOOHOO!!! Now that is a reason to celebrate!
God bless,
Gayle, aka Ben's Mom

Can't stand it!

2008-01-12T10:28:00.000-08:00

Good news...Good news...Good news! I was waiting until I received the actual document in my hot little hand, but....I can't stand it anymore! I have to tell someone. I was told that we received the new birth certificate for my lil' monster last week!!! That means his BC actually says "Melvin Ordonez George". WOOHOO...he finally is a George!

Whew...do I feel better. My plan is to still wait until I get a copy of it before I tell my family. My husband doesn't even know (snicker) I think it will be a nice surprise if I can just lay it down on the desk in front of him. Do you think he'll figure out what it is?

Hope to hear even better news next week. They told us that we should have the passport on Tuesday or Wednesday of this coming week. That means that in no time at all we can submit for authorization of the second DNA. (They have to wait for a trivial thing to occur first...something about the inauguration of the new President - no big deal).

Anyway...hope to post again soon! Hope everyone has a great weekend. Hug yourself today!!!

Gayle

Insanity Reincarnate

2008-01-05T05:43:00.000-08:00

Whew....do things ever get better? Lately, there have been developments where PGN has posted they will not accept any new cases until the "Central Authority" is created.
H-E-L-L-O...when will that happen? As of today, there is no real plan in place. They are working on it. So, what does everyone do in the mean time? Wait? Wait for the 30 day deadline to expire?

And this brings me to another "soapbox". What about the press and all the true-journalistic reporting they have been doing. While they are trying to create enough noise to sell their treasured works of writing, sometimes they become part of the problem. They have, of late, leaned towards a tendency to only relay part of the story. Now, part of that I may understand. They don't always have enough room in their allotted space to fully explain the piece they are reporting. Well, if this be the case....either keep your pen dry or explain that in your article. Simple solution, right? Wrong. I guess that they are just like the rest of us and never like to acknowledge the fact that they don't know everything. Hard pill to swallow. But wouldn't it be better rather than misguide some and create unnecessary panic and confusion? I don't get it. Maybe that's why I am not a journalist. The truth, be it crystal and sparkling clear, seem important and much more preferable to a well spun story.

Back to my original intent... I feel sooooo bad for the people that are stuck in the process that doesn't know what to do with itself. My heart is extremely heavy for you. I know the added stress this is causing. Even though, the general consensus is that it will all get ironed out and everything will be just fine....the not knowing can be maddening. That again is a direct result of how people in power forget about the people they are making laws for. They sometimes forget that behind every file is a family waiting anxiously for their child. The wait is worse than any pregnancy. And until someone has been through it, you just never truly know how hard it is.

So, before lawmakers bend to the will of others, they should first consider who they are affecting. If you do not have a true plan, wait until you do. "Winging it" just isn't acceptable. Leaving people in limbo is a piss-poor, sloppy job.

I will continue to pray for the strength, patience and endurance of waiting families. And I'll pray that the lawmakers get their act together and have their new system up and running quickly. It is my hope that they DO NOT leave these families hanging on the edge any longer. As it looks, January 01, 2008 ushered in a sad day for Guatemalan adoptions and the children stuck in between.

God bless,
Gayle

Infant Colic Treatment and Causes

2008-01-02T16:28:00.000-08:00

Information for Ilse, her daughter and grandchild. I hope this helps!!! Just follow the link...
Love,
Gayle

Infant Colic Treatment and Causes

Feliz Ano Nuevo!

2008-01-01T05:28:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year everyone!!!

I pray this will be a joyous year for all of us.

I pray for continued health of the one's dear to me.

I pray my adoption family finishes their processes in the coming year, resulting with their beloved children at home, safe and sound. (Fe nunca floja!)

And somehow, I pray for peace. That the world puts down their swords and the killing stopped. I pray someday our nations can find a peaceful way for resolution.

And last but not least, I pray for my second country, Guatemala. I pray God will guide the people making decisions for so many...... that they leave no child behind.

Espero que el ano que viene le traiga todo lo que usted desea.

Paz a todos,
Gayle

From Cloudy to Clear

2007-12-29T06:13:00.000-08:00

OK. Well, I guess it's time I explain how we got to this point. If you remember correctly, our agency was shut down for unethical practices. Around the same time, the facilitator that was the go between for our agency and the facilitator in Guatemala, was arrested for harbouring illegal aliens. (Yeah, I know. The pot just thickens.) Round about this time, I was starting to give up hope. It was just a mess. Come to find out, some of the hopeful parents really didn't have referrals at all. They were being lied to and the sweet children they said "yes" to were never up for adoption. The children actually had a family and it was sort of a system of rent-a-kid. Whenever the families would go over for visits, the agency would pay the true family money to allow them to use their children for a while. It was a nightmare. And I could go on and on about the things that came to the surface. But that is old news and no good will come of hashing up such negative stories. So, let's press on......

We, of course, were very concerned that our process was also fraudulent. We contacted several people that are "in the know" and they agreed to check it out for us. One was a popular Guatemala site, the other was a trusted adoption agency and then the last was the Adoption Supervisors, ( I call them the survival guide for Guat adoptions). They all conferred. We had a legit case! Ok, that's good. So, what's next?

Trying to set up communication with our team. Ben's birthday is in July. This past birthday he turned two. My husband and I decided to go over and spend it with him. This was our "do or die" mission.. During this trip we were connected back to a dear friend that we have used as a translator while in country. We had lost contact with her b/c our agency had forbidden us to use her services anymore. Instead, they had another translator that worked "more" closely with the agency, (Yeah, I bet). She was also later detained and banned with the embassy. ( Go figure) At any rate, the translator was horrified when I contacted her and told her our story. She said she would help us and would set up appointments while we were in country, so we could get to the bottom of what was going on. And that she did. First we spoke with one of the original attorneys on the case. She explained exactly what had taken place and where we needed to go from there. She also agreed to work with us in any way she could. That was a big deal. She could have refused and I would still be crying the blues today.

Next, we move on to a new attorney. One that is ethical, (w/ clients), and a go-getter. Upon our first appointment, I was impressed. He showed up with all of our file in hand and he had already done his homework. He knew exactly where we stood and what needed to be done. Great! We settled on a fee and he was hired. Now, keep in mind, this type of thing is not normal. It is not "politically" correct to bypass your main team and contract outside help. It is a little risky. But we were at the end of our rope and it was "do or die" time, remember?

My husband and I came back home, full of hope. We finally had a ray of sun on our faces and the warmth of the hope felt good. "E', the new attorney ran into many more difficulties than originally expected. (In my opinion, the only thing to be expected in our case, is that, you get what you don't expect). To make the story short, he had to keep going back to Pto Barrios, over and over. I have a feeling that the staff at the civil registry and Judge were still so upset with our case and all the extra work caused by our original attorney, that they just kept toying with "E". On his maiden voyage, he found our file was sent to the abandoned file. They had given up that anyone would come back to finish this case. (Hacheemama!) And when he finally got everything straight, except for the signature of the Judge, the good Judge took his frustrations out on "E". He would tell him to come back next week and he would sign the paper for him. So "E" would travel over the mountains and through the hills once again, just to have the good Judge tell him he was too busy, come back next week. Well, after many trips and a brief stay in the hospital, (from a little green present he picked up while in Pto. Barrios), he FINALLY got the signature. YEAH!!! We had what we needed to move forward. While the ink was still wet on the papers, he moved quickly to the next office and received the new birth certificate. God is good. Through this little Sherman Tank of a man, we had our documents correct.

Next, move back to the black hole of PGN. That building is like the roach motel. Files go in, but never go out. (Just kidding). But while you are in there, it feels that way. "E" kept an eye on our file the whole time it was there. When it came down to the wire and we were finally with the last reviewer. He would sit at PGN and pester them for news on our file. He took people out to eat and stayed in the building day after day. His tenacity paid off. We have our file approved! As of December 13th, 2007. That was a joyful day!!!

Now the file is back with our main team and they are doing their part. We still have a few steps left, but they are all requirements of the US. It is just a matter of time now. The guesswork is over. Our little son, WILL BE OUR LITTLE SON! No doubt about it! Thank you God. And now, please let me take the time to thank the people that are true players in our case.

First, God. Thank you for keeping me from going crazy, (and those little pink pills). You knew I would be a mother one day and your lesson in patience has paid off. I may be a slow student, but I am no dummy. I have learned what you taught loud and clear.

Next, Ilse. You are a beacon of light. Thank you so much for your continued support and friendship. Without you, we would not have our son coming home. God put you back in our path as a catalyst. You are the one that got the ball rolling again. Others may not be able to see it, but I can. Your halo is luminous and wings, strong and beautiful. Thank you for carrying us this far.

And to "E". You are our Ever-Ready Bunny and Weebles-Wobbles all in one. You kept going at them, never faltered and never gave up. Thank you! Thank you! Thank you, for your tenacity. I know it was a job you were hired for, but I will never be convinced that you saw it as just another job. You had to have had your heart and soul in this one to get as far as you did. You too, are an angel.

And begrudgingly, I need to thank my main team. Even though it has been a long road and you brought us to it, you are redeeming yourself now. You have been efficient in the last steps. Thank you. And thank you for your part in bringing my son home.

And last but certainly not least. Family and Friends. Thank you for the continued patience and support. I know it was a long haul, but we made it, (WITH RELATIONSHIPS AND MINDS IN TACT). Our reward...Ben.

I have met so many amazing people on this journey. Some taught me how not to behave and others are a ray of hope. I love and cherish every one. And to the rest of the Long Road Home'rs. You know who you are. Thank you for your friendships and circle of support. I pray every last one of us will be able to take part in the celebration of our children's homecoming. What was it "W" put so well...Now that the holidays are over, it is time for the "Mama Bears" to come out of hibernation. Let's kick some butt and get those children home!

My Baby Boy is Coming Home!

2007-12-27T18:28:00.001-08:00

Ain't he cute? This has been the most wonderful Christmas holiday ever! On December 13 we got the news that we FINALLY received Approval of our case. WE ARE OUT! WE ARE OUT! WE ARE OUT!

Oh, you have no idea how good it is to be able to say those words. We have waited two and a half years. This has been a process from Hell and at times, I doubted we would ever get this far. But God has been good to us....in more ways than one.

We also found out, the day after Christmas, that Ben's birth mother signed her final document. He is REALLY and FINALLY OURS! Can you believe it? Now we just have to wait for a few more documents from the US side and we will be on our way.

I am going to make this a short post. Just wanted to post the good news and to apologize, (of sorts), for being so inactive for the past year. But all I had was bad news and plenty of it. It was getting to be a little redundant. And if I hadn't of lived it myself, I would have thought the story to be some horrible "B" rated flick. But now...we are on to greener pastures and it's time to put the rose-colored glasses back on!!!

So for now, please join us in the celebration. And for my friends still waiting for their good news, please say a prayer for them. Take care.

My Baby Boy in His Bus

2007-12-27T17:59:00.000-08:00

Premature in the Nursery

2006-10-03T18:51:00.000-07:00

Well....I guess we were a little premature in fixing up the nursery. We were informed today that we were KO'd for the birth certificate, again. We were also told that we are no longer dealing with a "simple" rectification. (I don't see what has been so simple about it) Now that our braniac facilitator has resubmitted with the decreto posing as the rectification that was required, we have to correct the damage that has been done. This means that first, we have to get a court order to obtain a "inscription" that cancels the decreto. Once this is obtained we can proceed with a reposition. If I am correct the latter can be gotten by the notarial way. Which normally takes about two months. The first step, no one has been able to give us a clue as to how long it may take. If you remember, our facilitator was trying to get the rectification originally by way of a court order. He tried for over 4 months and was still empty handed. In all, it boils down to, we are now looking well into 2007 before being able to bring Ben home. What a mess.

Gayle

Update

2006-09-29T04:19:00.000-07:00

Hello all! Haven't posted in a few weeks. I've just been waiting to get some news. But so far, that 'ol adage applies, no news is good news. I did find out on Tuesday of this week that our file has been passed on from the reviewer to the director's desk. He apparently has many of the cases trying to use this same decreto sitting there. From what I can gather, he has yet to approve any of them and is trying to decide what to do. So please, say your prayers that he will approve all of them. I have been praying non stop and sleeping with my four leaf clover, rubbing my rabbit's foot, patting Buddha on the belly, keeping my fingers crossed and anything else I can think of that may be in our favor. God bless. I will post as soon as I get any tidbits. Thank you for being here!

Gayle

REALITIES...

2006-09-11T11:45:00.000-07:00

I went into the local pottery store, full of anticipation and renewed hope. The change of seasons does that for me. The crisp feeling in the air reminds me that life is ever changing. This fact in itself cultivates a sense of a better tomorrow. I enjoy the change in color schemes and the decorating that goes along with it.

I was engrossed in the rich hues of reds, orange and yellows, and planning my house's ensemble for the season, when the next isle over, reality hit me,..smack in the face...CHRISTMAS decorations. This, I was not ready for...the thought of Christmas. A reality that I was not yet prepared to think about was the fact that we may very well have to weather another Holiday Season without Ben home. I felt like running from the store screaming to the top of my lungs with grief. "How can we do this again?", was what kept going through my mind.

Last year I was gracious and kept telling myself that it was OK for Ben's fostermother to share his first Christmas. Afterall, he wouldn't remember it and we would have every one after that. But now, I no longer feel that way. I am selfish and I want my son home. I am tired of someone else telling me about his holidays and sending me pictures. This nightmare no longer seems real and it just gets worse!

NEW PICTURES

2006-09-03T13:36:00.000-07:00

What a DOLL!

I LOVE that face...

13 months old...ain't he handsome?!

Decisions

2006-09-02T05:50:00.000-07:00

DECISIONS...this process is full of decisions. Even though, as adoptive parents, we feel that most of them are out of our hands. We have been in process for a little over a year and the biggest decision for every family is, "Will this be a good match". Every one of us wants to provide our child the world. That includes knowing that they will love us and be happy that they are a part of our families. I have to say that since our last visit, this has crossed my mind a few times. After Ben's obvious aversion, I have considered what if he just plain does not like me? But that is a subject reserved for another day.

I have been posed with the situation of adoption disruption a few times. The latest reason for thinking about it is by way of a friend. I have a dear friend that is experienceing a difficult adoption. For the people that are not at the core of the situation, they have, through concern for her, hinted at "other alternatives" to completing this adoption. That pretty much boils down to a disruption. The birth mother is allowed to back out up to the final decree, when her signature is required for the very last time. Adoptive parents are allowed to decide otherwise for much longer. We can disrupt the adoption during process, but we can also disrupt after the child comes home. This happens more often than you would think. In many cases it is due to no one's particular fault. Sometimes circumstances are just not the best for everyone involved. Other times, there are problems that can lay claim to blame. There have been many parents that have brought their "healthy" children home to find out that this is not the case. They may feel that once the truth is discovered, they are not equipped to handle the needs of this particular child. In either case, whether small or large, and no matter what stage the adoptions is, I am sure that the decision is a gutt-wrenching one to make.

My friend has had the question of disruption brought up to her a few times. At this point, she strongly refuses this option. She has met her daughter-to-be and now considers her flesh of her flesh. That is what happens when we go visit our children. When you hold that child for the first time, they miraculously become "our child". Forget that they were brought into this world by another. It's hard to describe the mentality. For me, I know that Ben was not conceived in my womb, but that line of separation from reality is very blurred. Almost to the point of being imaginary. All of the documents, courts and professionals helping us, prove that he was born by another woman. But my bond could not be any stronger to my child. He may have been brought into this world by a different woman, but he was born of my heart and soul. So, when someone considers disruption, it is not a simple matter. I have had one person mention terminating our adoption to me only once. She is someone that I love very much and I know she suggested it only because she also loves me. When she spoke those words and it finally sunk in what she was talking about, the mother lion in me sprang to life. I wanted to pounce on her and shred her from limb to limb in defense of my son. Instead, I politely, explained why that is not an option. I tried, with all of me effort, to hold back the flood gate of emotion this question threatened to burst forward. I'm not sure, but I would say that the flash of red in my eyes and the smoke rolling out my ears gave her a pretty good indication that this was a sensitive subject and not up for discussion. She has not brought it up again.

But this is not the case for everyone. I have spoken to some and heard of many cases where the adoption was disrupted by the adoptive family. For some, this is an answer. For my friend that I am sure will read this, it is not good or bad. I don't know how it will effect you, but now that this subject has been brought to your attention, the thought will probably not be far away. Once brought to me, I have revisited this idea many times. Mostly out of concern for what is best for my son. Almost instantly I come to my senses and quickly smack my brain for running along those parellels. But the thought is always close at hand. I guess it's there mostly because of the unknown. We have not a clue when Ben will be allowed to come home or if he will like it here, or us. The unknowns nag at me. Only time will tell what is best. Pray and hold dear that "A" is waiting. She is in a good place and well cared for. All will work out according to plan. It just may not be what you were planning. Go until you can go no more. If that time comes, you will know it. And know that there is no shame if it is your decision. Follow your heart. God will show the way if you allow him to. You are always in my prayers.

Gayle

Prayer for adopted child

2006-08-27T13:08:00.000-07:00

Following is a prayer I read from another adoptive families site. It is a jewish prayer. It really hit home for us so I decided to post it. Hope you like it....

WE DID NOT PLANT YOU, TRUE. But when the season is done, when the alternate prayers for the sun and for rain are counted. When the pain of weeding and the pride of watching are thru, we will hold you high. A shining leaf above the thousand seeds grown wild. Not by our planting, but by heaven. Our harvest. Our own child

Shhh...a quiet update

2006-08-25T16:08:00.000-07:00

I want to give you the update of where we are, but I am afraid. Right now we are in a very good position and I don't want to "jinx" it by talking about it. So maybe if I briefly explain it, without a lot of flash, I can get it to you without calling the attention of the jinx trolls. Here goes....

Just a personal note before I begin....I am doing this under the prompt of a good friend, (you know who you are). If this goes sour, I am holding you responsible.

OK...you remember the false prophet? The decreto? The one that promised to be a fix-all for us and then fell through? Well, it's back! First of all, decreto is spanish for decree. It was a decree issued by their body of government that is simliar to our law makers in the states. It is a temporary decree good for 90 days. When Palomo, our facilitator, went to Puerto Barrios last week, he was to plead with the courts for a date or the local PGN to allow us to finish the notarial way. But, instead he came back with a new birth certificate, by way of decreto. He is going to try and get us PGN approval with this new birth certificate. I have asked the AS if they think this will fly. They have given me a very honest, "I don't know." It seems we have a 50/50 chance. Either yes or no, (hmmm, brilliant). SOOOO, we were resubmitted to the ever dreadful, all consuming, PGN Thursday. Go ahead. You can squeal sounds of delight, but please do it quietly, you never know who's listening. I have been walking on cloud nine since we have gotten the news. My conservative side has repeated to me many times, "don't count your chickens..." and my happy go-lucky, let's celebrate side has said, "Oh life's too short. Go ahead and party, someone will pick up the trash tomorrow." That leaves us walking a balancing act of cautious celebration. We should know in about four weeks if they will allow this process. I pray they will. He occupies my every thought and if will alone was enough to get him here, he would have come home a long time ago.

So, please keep this in you prayers..pray that they will accept this rectification with the decreto and they approve our case soon. It wouldn't hurt to cross your fingers and rub your rabbit's foot either.

waiting "patiently",
Gayle

False Hope

2006-08-19T15:23:00.000-07:00

Today we received great news!!! I went to check my email. Not really expecting anything. The last time I had spoken to AS, we confirmed that they would not hear any more news until at least the Monday of next week. So I was just going thru the motions, trying to find something to occupy my mind. And there it was...a email from AS. Hmmmm...that's curious. Why would they be writing me today? They started off with the heading that they had great news! There had been something called a detecto issued two days prior and they felt it would help our case. The detecto was basically a sort of free-for-all for all of the people experiencing trouble in completing their rectification from the civil registry's office. Apparently, the government had given the go ahead for everybody to go to the local registry, with birth mother in tow, and the appropriate paperwork would be issued, right there, johnny-on-the-spot. How great is that!?! That would mean we could abandon this whole other mess and hopefully be resubmitted to PGN within a couple of weeks. Oh, my prayers have been answered. Thank you God!

I quickly went to my address book and starting contacting the others that I knew of that were in the same boat. It's a miracle. We have all been given grace!

But, alas, this feeling of euphoria was short lived. Later in the afternoon I received another email from AS. The AS giveth, and the AS taketh. Here he explained that they were just recently given clarification by PGN on the detecto. Apparently it was not the cure all it originally appeared. This quick fix was only for a very minute group. Something about you had to have been born in El Salvador on the 3rd day of February, in the leap year, but before the millenium, and your mother had to be wearing red when you were born....or some such silliness. At any rate, it was fun while it lasted. Imagining that maybe we were approaching the end of this horrible ordeal. Many people have described international adoption as a roller coaster ride from hell. I personally think the description is short of the mark.

Today is Saturday. We are suppose to hear something early next week. Maybe it will be the news we have been waiting for...here's hoping!!!

Thankful Heart

2006-08-16T11:07:00.000-07:00

I woke up this morning with a thankful heart. I have been actively trying to appreciate the things I DO have and trying not to focus on the things I don't. After all, we have a lot to be thankful for. Ben is not home, this is true, but...he is healthy and being taken care of by a family that loves him and watches out for his well-being. The rest of my family is healthy and some of us are getting stronger everyday. That's a blessing. I have a roof over my head, a blessing. Our business seems to be thriving, another blessing. What more could a person ask for?

Quite honestly, even though I do thank God everyday for all that he has provided, I still fall short in the gratefulness department. I can't help it. I miss my son. And I know that everyday he is growing and learning. I just want to be a part of his life.

When I get asked about all of the events in Ben's life that we have missed, i.e. his first Christmas, his 1st birthday, 1st teeth, 1st steps, 1st word, on and on. My normal reply is, "Yes, we may have missed the firsts, but once he is home, we will get the rest." I try to believe my own words. But deep down inside, I know, I mourn not being able to celebrate these milestones.

We received news today that our facilitator is staying in Puerto Barrios to try and get some resolve from our case. Either by hopefully speeding up a court date or by convincing PGN to allow us to get the rectification by notarial means. Either way that means we have set still for another week. No movement one way or the other. I have never felt more like a dog chasing his tail than I do today. Round and round we go, exhausting all that energy, but we really never get anywhere.

This all boils down to the fact that we are still, in all reality, at least 3 months from bringing Ben home. That puts us at December. NOrmally I would say that this would be a wonderful time to bring a child into our lives. Right at Christmas, just in time for Santa. How great is that? But, I am a tax accountant. In my mind all I see is the fact that my son will get home just in time for mommy to start working 12 and 13 hours a day, 6 days a week. If he was a little suspicious of me on our last visit, can you imagine how he is going to feel about the person that leaves before he gets up and comes home after he goes to bed? I will get to spend time with him only on Sundays for about two months. This is not working out any where close to the way we had planned. Oh well...the best laid plans and all. I know, I know. I have a lot to be thankful for and I should just stop whining. All it does is use up the oxygen in the air and never benefits anyone. Just humor me for a while. I won't stay on the pity train for long...I promise!
Gayle

ADD ANOTHER LINK

2006-08-04T09:02:00.000-07:00

ADD ANOTHER LINK to the chain of professionals working on Ben's case. We found out today that our main team has contracted another attorney in Puertos Barrios to try to get a court date set. According to the main team, Puerto Barrios is about a six hour drive for them and the distance has made it difficult for them to procure a hearing. Oh really? So we have been waiting a little over three months for this, and come to find out you haven't really done anything at all? Bad, bad attorney.

I feel now that by the time we are able to bring Ben home, he will have had a majority of the legal counsels in Guatemala touch his case. I can see it now. On our pick-up trip, at the Guatemala airport, a sea of attorneys hosting a farewll party for Ben.

I was so hoping for some news of progression this week. Oh well, we march on to next week. Hopefully we will hear something then.

New Pictures!

2006-08-01T15:43:00.000-07:00

Little drummer boy

Play boy

My sweet baby boy

Que pasa?

2006-08-01T08:22:00.000-07:00

That's the question we found ourselves saying mostly...what's wrong? We just came back from our most recent visit. While it was wonderful seeing Ben, it was also very hard.

GOOD NEWS...
HE IS WALKING!!! Yep, he travels anywhere he wants now. He may look like someone's put something in his milk, but he gets there on his own. This part was really fun. Watching him walk all over the place. Of course, this marks the end of being able to control what he can come in contact with, and the beginning of much more vigilence from mama and papa.

His four teeth are solidly in place and we could see a few more starting to make their appearance. If you don't believe us, just let him get one of your body parts to his mouth...OUCH, does he have a bite!!!

NOT SO GOOD NEWS...
This trip we came head on with the visible effects of attachment issues. After Ben's fostermother left our hotel room, and he realized she had left him there, he had nothing more to do with me. He was very clingy to Paul. If Paul left the room, Ben would wail. If Paul put Ben down, he would wail. If Paul turned away, Ben would wail. Get the picture? Paul had to sleep, breathe and eat with Ben attached to his side. Which is what we came there for, to be close to Ben. But, I kinda' wanted to share in some of the bonding also. I felt very much like I was constantly looking thru a window at the two of them. That is, of course, until I came close to them. Then Ben would start to wail, again. I expected to deal with some attachment issues, but when we were faced with them, it was harder then imagined. I so wanted Ben and I to have the bonding experience we had on my last visit. He was so happy and accepted me as his care giver. He looked to me for comfort and would reach out to me. It was just as every mother dreams. Those tiny hands reaching out with that hopeful look of wanting his mother to hold him. How I cherish that feeling .

We were given many theories as to what was going on. Some simple and some more complicated. One, was that he didn't care for the color of my hair. You see, my husband has black hair and brown eyes. I have lighter brown hair and green eyes. I had several native people give this reason. They told me that their own children are very shy around people of fairer appearance. The second theory was that Ben remembers me from my last visit. That was when he bonded so well with me and then I left him. Gave him back to his fostermom. So, the idea is that he didn't trust me to stay. Which, of course, was the truth. I wasn't staying. ( I told you he's smart) The third was one of the more complicated reasons...attachment issues. We were told that since Ben is getting older and he is more able of in depth feelings and thought, these issues would become more valid. The longer he stays in Guatemala, the more he becomes attached to his family there and is more leery of strangers. Which we are to him. Right now I am a stranger to my son, (oooh, that causes pain to say) Actually, the news is not all bad. These issues are a sign of good emotional health. That he has the ability to attach is one of the milestones for a child. Children from orphanages or who have been in the foster care system and experience several different care givers sometimes have difficulty attaching to their forever family. These abilities to bond and trust a mother and family are very basic. They are cultivated early in life. If the ability is not nurtured early on, sometimes it is lost. And then these children find it very difficult to trust those base relationships. This in turn can cause many devastating effects for the rest of their lives. So, as I said earlier, all is not bad. In a way, Ben reacted in a very healthy manner. Even though it was hard for us, we understand it. We, being the adults know how to sort out these complicated feelings. Ben is too young to know how to process these type of raw emotions. The result, he cries. And he did plenty of that. Because he seemed so uncomfortable with me, we decided to give him back to his fostermother 4 days early. This was a hard decision, but best for Ben. We saw it as no need to put him through this trying time and facilitate a bonding experience just to leave him again. We will cross that bridge when it will be most effective, our pick-up trip. So, that means ,we have for now, decided that this was our last visit. I pray that our case gets moving so that we can be resubmitted to PGN. At least then we will have some ray of hope that we are moving in the right direction.

We did get some tidbits of information from the fostermother. She said that according to Palomo's office, (facilitator), the reason we had to go thru the lengthy court process was when they went back to get the original birth certificate from the civil registry, the book it was recorded in was lost. That meant there was no original to correct. Therefore we have to prove that Ben was born and to whom. I know. It sounds sort of silly and clumsy. But, it's the fact and now we have to deal with it. So, we are still waiting for word of the court hearing.

Some processes are more complicated than others. Ours is the same, more complicated than some, but not as difficult as others. I have met people that have been in our shoes for over two years. My prayers go out to them everyday. And I have met others that experienced the "magical" processes. Those that are in and out of the whole mess in break neck speed. God bless them. It gives the rest of us hope that the system does work.

Mother warned me....

2006-07-24T17:53:00.000-07:00

OK...I know...Mom knows best. She always warned me to leave well enough alone. But noooo. I had to push the envelope and keep asking questions! I should have just kept my mouth shut and enjoyed the moment. You see, we are working with an attorney firm in Guatemala in addition to our adoption attorneys. They work as adoption supervisors. Kind of overseeing everything to help insure a smooth process. They really are a God send and they have been worth their weight in gold. This evening they contacted me about our pending hearing. They had been in contact with our facilitator's office and found out that he expects to visit Puerto Barrios and have the witness statements by Friday after next. Yeah!!! That,..is where I should have shut up. My bad. The rejoicing was short lived. I actually opened my mouth and pushed the envelope. "So this means we will be ready to resubmit?" ( BAM - here it comes) "No, there is much more to be done from here. Next thing is to send the file to the civil registry office, the civil registrar has to issue a declaration of facts, then it goes back to the courts, then it gets sent to the PGN in Puerto Barrios, (they too have to give their opinion), then the file goes back to the courts and the judge will resolve. Once this is done, the new birth certificate gets requested."

What did I tell ya'? Should have left well enough alone. Sorry Mom. I'm kind of dense sometimes.

Tomorrow will be a better day.

Leaving on a jet plane...

2006-07-24T08:22:00.000-07:00

Hola Compadres! Just wanted to let everyone know that we are getting ready for our visit. We will be leaving on Wednesday morning, bright and early. Can you believe it? By Wednesday night I will have my son in my arms!!! Although, he will not be too happy about it. Our last visit he cried himself to sleep the first night. He was upset about leaving his foster mom, (plus he had an ear infection). A visit from the doctor and a good nights sleep soon remedied any of his maladies.

I will post new pictures as soon as I get back. He should be walking this trip, (that'll be fun). Gotta' go for now....there's so much to do before we leave....shopping, diapers, ointment, boogers dopper, toys, snack food, packing, underwear (check), shirts (check), pants (check), deodorant (check), toothbrush (check), toothpaste (check).....................................Ready to go.
Hasta luego!

I'm leaving on a jet plane, I don't know when I'll be back again... Leavin' on a jet plane, don't know when I'll be back again. Oh babe, I hate to go-aow-aow

But one request

2006-07-23T05:13:00.000-07:00

We chose foreign adoption for numerous reasons. I will not go into all of them. Following are only a few:

Guatemala is considered a private adoption
Because of that, you are allowed to visit your child whenever you want and allowed to "foster" during the process
The process, (normally), is very short in comparison to other programs
The health of the children are excellent
Most children are fostered from birth, this cuts down risk of attachment issues

The biggest reason, we prayed. We prayed God would open the door. And he did, by way of my father. When we announced we had been investigating adoption, our families were supportive. My father had but one request, a boy. We have no grandsons on my side of the family. Even though my father has never complained about us girls, I believe he has always secretly wished for a boy child to nurture and watch grow. He had suffered enough of sugar and spice and everything nice, now it was time for frogs, snails and puppy dog tails. (just kidding, pop!) So that decision was made, we would adopt a boy. From there the countries were narrowed to Guatemala. A large majority of the children available for adoption from this country are boys. Not that they have a ratio of more males than females, but rather, the girls get chosen first. That is where we begin our journey to meet our son!

We contacted many agencys and again prayed. We chose a agency, but the initial path was a little bumpy. So we switched. Our new agency had a child that was our son!

We knew it from first sight. Our son, Benjamin, was now within reach.

The paper chase is often described as hectic. There are so many forms and documents. Everything has to be notarized, authenticated , sealed, and translated. But we "whooped" it in break neck speed. That being done, we were off to meet our social worker. Her name is Kat and she is a sweetheart. She quickly relieved our fears about whether or not we were good enough to be parents. From there, we really enjoyed our visits. She is a true gem.

Now the chase begins over there, in Guatemala. Once approved and bestowed the right to parent, our dossier gets sent to Ben's country to start the process there. His case is assigned a social worker, interviews are held, and a family court is petitioned. When they agree that Ben would best be served by way of adoption, he gets the first seal of approval. Then DNA tests are done. They do these in order to confirm there was no funny business and that Ben was truly offered for adoption by his birth mother. Thank God it was a match! Now we petition the US Embassy for preapproval. They gave their blessings. Next we enter a hierarchy, supremo, no all be all court, called PGN. This begins the dreaded wait. In here, adoptive parents enter an eternal black hole of, "no news is good news". I have to say that our adoption agency contact is a VERY PATIENT woman. I am sure she was not the least bit aware of just how many opportunities we would get to talk when she accepted our file :) This is where we are now...the black hole. Actually, there has been some movement in our case. But only that of trying to get a new birth certificate. You see, the original had a typo in the birth mother's last name. So, this has to be corrected. And there, is where we truly are. In another court. Waiting for someone to recognize that the "r" should have been an "a". (duh)

Sounds simple, right? Well this is the cliff notes version. I have tried to give you a very positive description. I have left off the tears, heart breaking news, endless depression, roller coaster highs and lows, eternal "whys" and all over gloom and doom. I do not want to mar my son's blessed events by negative undertones. Once he is home and in our arms, everything will be rosy. The sleepless nights will be remembered through rose colored glasses, AND HIS SMILES WILL FOREVER LIGHT OUR DAYS!